Let It Go!

"Let it go" is a a quote from an Autistic student of mine that I had about 3 years ago. This young man didn't say much in class but when he saw me getting upset, the first thing out of his mouth to the class was "Let it go Ms. D". And the only way he would stop saying this phrase was if I repeated it back in an appropriate manner. If I said it loud or angry, it wasn't good enough. I had to say it in the right tone that was heartfelt or he wouldn't have it. He was my gauge at that time in my life for my anger and now when I get to that point, I hear his voice saying to me "Let it go Ms. D". However, yesterday when I was attacked on the phone by one of my parents like I wasn't even there, I didn't hear the words come to me. I sank back and stayed silent. I didn't fight back, I didn't defend myself. I could only continue with what I was there to do and that was to finish an IEP meeting. Later when I shared with my husband why I was upset I realized, it really hurt me. Even though it wasn't my fault why this parent was angry, I took it personal. Attacks on our character even when we are not at fault can be hard to accept. I know I need to "Let it go" but even today, I'm hurt and don't understand why someone would act so unprofessionally on the phone in a teleconference. These kinds of experiences are supposed to make us stronger, better, and wiser but all I can think of is God let me down. This woman got away with hurting me on that call and although the other members encouraged me and stated afterwards that it was uncalled for, I still take it personal on my character. No matter how much we want to help others, they don't always want our help. Being someone that likes control, I had to "Let go and let God". So thanks M, I will try and let it go.